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…is the moment God wants to whisper something so clever in my ear; so mind-blowing.

…is the moment I am on the edge of breakthrough; and the enemy sees it too.

…is the moment I will be ever so close to Him, His spirit, His light, His overflow.

…is the moment God is pushing me into my destiny, and I have become fearful.

There are 101 reasons we don’t want to pray – and don’t – when we know we need to the most. Prayer, meditation, personal time with God is when He trains you to hear His voice, to know His spirit. He sends confirmation that is without a doubt, and lets your mind be at rest and at peace with whatever the clutter of yesterday, today, and tomorrow brings…

When you don’t want to pray is when you desire God the most and when He is summoning you to hold one of the best conversations you’ll ever have. The past few days have been hard for me – I must admit. I felt like my thoughts were in a whirlwind of chaos and clutter with the blessings He has given me. I felt so distracted and unorganized. So I did nothing…absolutely nothing. How crazy is that – too many blessings? What does this let me know about me? That my heart is sincere about Him. That I am not just focused on His outpour of blessings to me; I want to know Him and how He affects me – and that is great!

So how did I get out of my “don’t wanna pray” funk? I wrote this blog – LITERALLY. As I write, I feel like running, falling on my knees and crying out to God, but quietly. Sometimes God doesn’t require us to put on a theatrical performance to get His attention. The thing is, we already have His attention; He’s just fighting for ours. So what is it that I have to do? Just like I did when I was little and told my parents when I needed help and how I needed it.

  1. Tell God You Need Him Now. It really doesn’t matter where you are. If He’s pulling at you, He knows your needs and your heart. He just wants you to say it to Him.
  2. Visit Him Daily.  I was talking with a friend of mine who said it only takes 22 days of you doing something consistently in order for you to make it a habit. Ok. So, God…I need you now. And I’d like to visit you daily – whenever I need you. Whenever I am overwhelmed. Please help me over these 22 days to visit you even when I am afraid to.
  3. Overcome Your Fear. The only reason you become fearful is the devil trying to destroy your thunder. I said it. He doesn’t want you anywhere near God! So he creates episodes of chaos, tells you that the blessings God has for you is too much, and plants seeds of “Am I ungrateful? Do I have faith?” in an effort to deter us from seeking God. I must say, I wallowed in that pit for a bit this week.
  4. Thank God for His Presence. God’s presence allowed me to finally feel like my thoughts of unfaithfulness and feeling undeserving were way off track. I deserve the blessings God has given to me because I want to be faithful and because I try to be. What God is blessing me with is not for me, but for a much greater purpose. Having feelings of being overwhelmed and undeserving only opens the door for selfish thoughts of “God gave it to me.” What God has given me is to help and share with others. And I am going to do just that.

Gee thanks, God. Little ‘ol me. Yes…ME!

~Kaye~

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